On the morning of September 2nd at about 7:45am I was awakened by a strange feeling I felt in my belly. It was like I heard something pop. I am still not sure if it was my imagination but I felt a jolt at the same time. I figured the baby kicked me in a weird spot. So I got up and started making my way to the bathroom and felt water dripping down my leg. I was worried about not knowing if my water broke but they say you KNOW and I definitely knew my water broke because I knew I wasn’t peeing myself.  At that point, I called my Midwives to let them know. They told me to just sit tight and touch base later, and to keep them posted.

I wasn’t feeling any pain or contractions until about 9:30am. I actually started getting cramps on my lower back and I didn’t know they were contractions until I realized they were coming and going in a pattern every 6 minutes. At about 10:30am everything changed like night and day. The contractions got closer, 3-4 minutes and then within 1/2 hour 2-3 minutes apart. My midwives told me to get in the tub at home until she would meet me at the hospital since she was a little further away. That way it would give her time to get to Morristown which is 10 minutes from my house.Unfortunately, within 15 minutes of her telling me to get in the tub, I had the “bloody show” and I felt like pushing so she told me to just go straight to the hospital immediately.

So we did. It was the worst car ride of my life. We were only 10 minutes away from the hospital and my husband ran all the red lights and it seemed like it took forever. I got there at about noon and I was already pre- registered and the midwives had called and said I was on the way so they just rolled me right into the tub room and started monitoring me. At this point I was completely out of it, screaming in pain. I was 6cm dilated and fully dilated within 20 minutes, so the pushing began. My midwife got there and we started.

As you know, I was planning a water birth and needless to say, I didn’t have a water birth. I was too far along and in extreme back labor because the baby was posterior so every single position I tried, I was in excruciating pain. Also, the baby had to be monitored the whole time because his heart rate kept dropping since he was in my pelvis for so long. They had to give me an IV because I was extremely dehydrated (you can’t really drink when you’re in that much pain.) At this point the thoughts going through my head were….”Is it too late for a c-section, maybe that would have been less pain?” I am deathly afraid of surgery so the fact that I was thinking that was a better option can give you some idea of the pain I was in. Also, the whole time I kept saying, ” now I know why people want drugs, I understand now”…..I was completely delirious and whiney. I was weak. It was the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life.

I pushed for about 2 1/2 hours. My uterus was contracting and they were painful, but my uterus wasn’t moving the baby down. I was working too hard and my uterus wasn’t. They had to give me a couple of drops of PIT so it could help me push him out. Within 1/2 hour, lots of pain, and an episiotomy later, my baby boy was born. Unfortunately, I had to have the episiotomy because the umbilical cord was wrapped around his head to she had to pull his head out and unwrap it. Needless to say that sh*** hurt!

At that very moment though, the oxytocin took over my body, nothing else mattered but my little baby, they laid him on top of me and we began our bond, skin to skin, tears rolling down my face of joy and relief. I wondered to myself if I could ever do that again. It was intense, the whole experience. I pretty proud though, that I did it natural and even though it was insanely painful, I wouldn’t have changed anything.

I don’t know what I would have done without my husband there and without my midwives. They were the best coaches and care providers I could have chosen. Also – the hospital staff from Morristown Memorial were amazing as well.

They say the first one is always the hardest, so I hope that is true because I definitely want to have another baby and after that experience I wasn’t so sure I could go through with it. But it was pretty encouraging to hear that the 2nd is easier. I guess I will find out when that time comes.